Insanity
by Emzilla97
Summary: Derp. Nuff said.
1. Chapter 1

So, I decided to write something funny. And nobody is reading my Mario fic. D:

Ok, so this is my first LoZ story. FLAMES WILL BE USED TO TOAST MALLOWS.

Link: Sheesh, calm down Emma.

SHADDUP LINK NOBODY ASKED YOU, YOU... YOU TIGHTPANTS.

:D

Disclaimer: I dunt own LoZ or Nintendo or stuffs. But I do own all my OCs!

ON WITH THE SHOW!

It was a sunny day in Hyrule.. On a Sunday. And everyone was asleep. Except for the Princess. She had errands to do.

Suddenly, a fairy started hitting a young boy in green across the face. "OI LINK GET UP YOU LAZY ARSE. TODAY'S ZELDA'S BIRTHDAY. YOU NEED TO GET HER A PRESENT. SO GET UP YOU LAZY SONOFAGUN."

"Navi."

"WHAT."

"Eff off."

With that, the fairy flipped the boy off and flew away. Wait a minute.. Fairies don't have arms.. How can they flip you off? O.O

As Link contemplated the meaning of life, Zelda was at the mall, shopping for tampons. "Stupid mother nature," She mumbled, "Why can't she bugger off.."

A WILD FANGIRL APPEARED!

Zelda's turn!

Run

Attack

Hide

Flip off

"Hmm.."

ZELDA USED FLIP OFF.

Fangirl used ask for autograph!

Zelda's Turn!

Run

Attack

Hide

Sign Paper

ZELDA USED SIGN PAPER!

IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE!

Wild Fangirl fainted!

OOOO Back to Link.

"Navi! I know what to give her! I'll give her this pasta necklace I made!"

"Dear goddess.. Why did the Deku Tree put me with this moron.."

OOOOOOOOOOOO And back to Zelda!

Zelda used walk away from body casually while whistling.

"Dum de dum de dummmm.."

After that, Zelda walked into her fave shop. Suddenly she heard the birthday song playing on the background. She suddenly remembered it was her birthday. And then Link appeared on Zelda's head. "Stupid Warp songs."

Zelda sighed and took the Ocarina from link, Sending him back to where he came from, but felt something strange around her neck. Wait a minute.. A Pasta necklace..?

Ok, I suck at writing anything beyond 300 words.

HALP MEEEE

Emma~~


	2. Fish

INSANITY 2.0

"Navi."

"What?"

"Navi."

"What?"

"Navi."

"WHAT?"

"Navi."

"WHAT DO YOU FREAKING WANT!"

"Derp."

Link smiled cutely and farted.

"Moron." The small blue fairy sighed and flew out the window, before slamming into a wall.

*DERP DERP DERP* (This is my new scene breaker :D)

Meanwhile..

The Princess sat upon her golden throne, looking all regal and stuffs for the people who she really doesn't even care about. And then it happened. It was small at first, then it grew larger, and larger.

""

The stench was so bad it burnt a hole in the castle door. All the guards just stared. Then the smell got them. Eyes widened, noses were pinched and cows were milked.

Zelda pointed her slender finger towards the guard sitting down reading his newspaper.

"He did it."

**DERP DERP DERP**

"DUDE. DUDE. DUUUUDE. WHERE DID YOU PUT MY POKEMON BLACK GAME."

Mido shrugged at Saria and rolled his eyes.

"I gave it to that hobo over there."

Saria's eyes turned into plates, which smashed. Then her eyeballs grew back again. She chased the fugly hobo.

~CUE BENNY HILL MUSIC~

*DERP DERP DERP*

"Uh oh, Link."

"What, Kafei?"

"SHHHH, She'll hear us!"

"WHO WILL HEAR US?"

"Link, you idiot!"

"OHHHHHH LIIINKY POOOO!"

A Wild Ruto appeared!

Link's Turn!

Fight

Items

Derp

Flee

Link used Flee!

But it didn't work!

Wild Ruto used Mean Look!

You can no longer escape from battle!

Link's Turn!

Fight

Items

Derp

Flee

Link opened his bag!

"Hmm… Let's see.. Meh."

Link closed his bag!

Link used Derp!

But nothing happened.

Wild Ruto used Attract!

But Link's (ability) DERPDERP prevented him from falling in love.

Link's Turn!

Fight

Items

Derp

Flee

xFIGHTx

Fart 0/50 PP

Urinate 5/300 PP

Punch 20/20 PP

Be an idiot 0/500000 PP

Link used Punch!

It's Super effective!

Wild Ruto used "I'M TELLING DADDY!"

Link's Turn!

Fight

Items

Derp

Flee

Link used Urinate!

Wild Ruto ran back to her daddy!

Link used victory pelvic thrust!

*DERP DERP DERP*

You like? HUUUH? HUUUUUUUUUUUUUH?

Ok, so, I just the need to get some stupidity out of my system. Also, a new pokemon battle will be in every chapter of this.. thing.. I don't have endless ideas! POKEMON BATTLE REQUESTS, PL0X!

Review please? You don't have to, but I do appreciate it.


End file.
